sweet sound

I can't believe the Summer is nearing an end. Even though it's not quite July yet, Summer always flies by once the fourth of July rolls around the corner. Six months ago, I would say that I dread going back to school....but now, I am more thrilled than ever to be in my new beautiful apartment, back at Encounter, enjoying quality time with my friends, and starting my Senior year of college. God has done so much in and through me these past few months, teaching me things I needed to see... and opening my eyes to new realizations about my life. I am so blessed by all His provision, faithfulness and grace in my life. He has shown me to be JOYFUL in what He gives me... which is ISU. He has taught me to be CONTENT with where He has me for this time...this time is HIS purpose...this time is my season for His reason... I need to know and be comfortable in this time. It was hard coming to terms with that, seeing as though I'm quite impatient and often times irritable, but the Lord always prepares our hearts for what is to come, and I can most definitely say He has prepared mine for this up & coming year.

I'm not quite sure what all He holds for me this year... I bet there are things I would have never imagined He'd do. Probably a lot of hardships, but He has it all in His control. I am enjoying the time I am spending now as I nanny and work a second job, preparing for whatever comes for me in these next few months.

Something the Lord has shown me lately, is that, I am called to serve others. I am blown away by the heart He has given me for people..specifically women, but overall His people. Mostly, my generation at school. It's heartbreaking to see the thousands of people who reject Christ, deny Him, walk away, or just fully hate Him. Something I'm having a hard time understanding, God reassures me that in this world, there will be tribulation but HE has overcome. So comforting. A good friend of mine introduced me to a song by Sarah Reeves called "Sweet Sound". The first few lines read:

"I am an instrument of the living God,
My life a melody to His name.
More than the songs I sing,
Worship is everything,
I live to glorify my King.
Hear the song of my life...
Let it be a sweet sweet sound."

Amen. My life has been created to love the Maker of it. I was created to serve others with LOVE, selflessness, and with the gifts He has given me. He has given all of His children unique and special gifts, not to selfishly keep to ourselves, or use for our own glory and pride... but to glorify GOD and to bring others into His presence, or just to help others know and understand Him. I have learned that my life is destined to be a melody, a testimony, a living breathing example of Christ in every area of it. Thoughts, words, actions... it all mirrors (or should mirror..) Christ. Of course no one is perfect and our flesh often times overrides what the Spirit wants to do...but God is faithful. He has not punished us according to our iniquities. I love Him so much for that. Yet, in all I say, do, and think...I desire my life to be a sweet sound for Him, and to Him.

Everything I am, is for the Lord. NOTHING of this world should be stamped into my life. If the world is cheering for me, and loving me..chances are I'm doing something wrong. The only part of the world that I should be apart of, is to bring Jesus to it.

All else is fading away. He remains... and my prayer is that I would continue to fall more in love with Him daily, and that He would take away the laziness, the comfort, and the complacency I have in this world, and from the world. My prayer is that I would go out and be an active servant for Christ, in every which way...using the gifts He has so graciously blessed me with to bring glory to His name.

plans

I recently picked up the book "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan, and I encourage every single one of you to read it! It truly challenges TRUE Christianity and causes you to take a look at yourself to see if you're living towards holiness and adoration for the King. It's convicted me lately, that's for sure! In this season of my life, the Lord continues to show me over and over again that His ways are far beyond my own. It's so true. So often as Christians do we question and ask God questions regarding our lives. When something doesn't go our way we get irritated, upset, confused, and we ask the Lord, "why?" when truly..we don't have the right to even THINK such a question. I've been taught this lately.

Though things in my life have not panned out the way I wanted them to, I am still trusting that He is faithful! His plans are better than my own, and His ways are much higher than mine...it's beautiful, even when I don't know what's ahead.

So, what has the Lord shown me lately? Well for one, the confidence I had in school all my life, up until my junior year of college, has been MY CONFIDENCE. That's been the problem. I never had my confidence come from God, it's always been MINE. Talk about prideful. The Lord has shown me that the only way I can succeed in this life is through HIM. I can do nothing aside from Him, and I mean nothing! Total conviction. Second, He's revealed to me that sometimes, He needs to completely break me down, all together..in order to build me back up again to glory and peace. Not MY glory, but HIS! It's been a tremendous blessing to know that His work is not completed in me! He has much more to go!

The Lord gave me a few verses last night that truly ministered to me. On my face before Him, all I could do was weep in adoration, apology, amazement, and love for Him. He is truly, AMAZING! I'd like to share what He's been showing me in my life, and ask that you pray for me as this next new year approaches, and I desire to be more like my Heavenly Father. He is truly beautiful.

"God is wise in heart and mighty in strength. Who has hardened himself against Him and prospered? He removes the mountains, and they do not know. When He overturns them in His anger; He shakes the earth out of its place, and its pillars tremble; He commands the sun, and it does not rise; He seals off the stars; He alone spreads out the heavens, and treads on the waves of the sea; He made Bear, Orion, and the Pleiades, and the chambers of the south; He does great things past finding out, yes, wonders without number. If He goes by me, I do not see Him; If He moves past, I do not perceive Him; If He takes away, who can hinder Him? Who can say to Him, 'What are You doing?'" - Job 9:4-13 ~ God...is...the...CREATOR! He has shown me that everything we live, breathe, see, and do.. HE has created! NOTHING is because of man -- ALL is because of God! How BEAUTIFUL are HIS works! We should all marvel and worship at His feet! Who am I that I have a right to question what He's doing in my life? How dare me. He is all knowing, all moving, all POWERFUL, all PERFECT God. He just IS.

"The LORD has sworn and will not relent," - Psalm 110:4 ~ His promises NEVER fail. Though I sometimes kick and scream at the things I haven't received that hurt... HE will be FAITHFUL! His promise is still in action.... I believe because He has NEVER broken a promise, and never will!

"Look among the nations and watch--Be utterly astounded! For I will work a work in your days which you would not believe, though it were told you." - Habakkuk 1:5 ~ SO many times my loved ones encourage me that God has a perfect plan, and that even though I can't see it now, HIS ways will prosper, and His work will be completed until His coming! Yet, though I hear it, I don't always let it sink in and believe it. But it's so true, though I don't believe it, He will continue to do His work, and I will be AMAZED at the finished product.

"Gold refined in the fire." - Revelation 3:18 ~ This is me. Sometimes, I need to understand that I need to be remade, refined, and tested in order to come out running this race with all obedience, joy, patience, longsuffering, and fulfillment. Christ is testing me, and you in our walks to make sure we LOVE Him, stand strong for Him, and trust that He is going to do HIS perfect work (not our own) but HIS!

All these things are so precious to me... just knowing the love my Lord has for me, how immense, how huge, how PERFECT it is. How I wish the world would understand and know that God reigns. Though this world rejects Him, HE is still on the throne and will finish His work now and into eternity. What a glorious, beautiful, precious, perfect, amazing Prince we serve. He deserves all our love, life, and worship. It's so worth it, HE is so worth it.

"But none of these things move me; nor do I count my life dear to myself, so that I may finish my race with joy, and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God." - Acts 20:24

blessed be the name of the Lord.

"Through the trials and the pain....."

"..You give and take away, but blessed be YOUR name, Lord..."



The Lord has been so awesome in walking me through the book of Job in this season of my life, and it couldn't have been a more perfect time for me to read this special book. What a man of God Job was... he dealt with pounds and pounds of heartbreak and grief yet not ONCE did he forsake the name of the Lord, or lose trust in his Savior. It was such a conviction to me.

Through this season in my life the Lord has surely given me plenty, yet taken away plenty as well. Both blessings and heartbreaks have occurred and it got to a point where I was literally so fed up and overwhelmed I didn't think I could take another disappointment. It's always in those desperate times the Lord swoops down and saves you with His hand. Not once has He allowed me to be part in anything that I couldn't handle.

Reading the first chapter in Job, it states that after all the losses, hard ships, brokenness and failures he went through, he cried out,

"Naked I come from my mother's womb, And naked I shall return there. The LORD gave, and the Lord has taken away; BLESSED be the name of the Lord!"
Wow! What a sweet tenderhearted and DEVOTED man Job was to His precious Savior...even through all that heartache and trials. Not once did Job curse the name of God or state anything wrongfully of Him. Yet he trusted in God's precious plan for his life.

This season of my life, I have felt like Job has. Through many hardships and trials, I have often times felt desperate, hopeless, frustrated, aggravated, and upset almost questioning God's faithfulness in my life -- and why? There is NO reason for me to doubt God's goodness, and after reading bits and pieces of Job's life, I feel quite convicted because not once did he curse the name of our Father even after all the junk he went through. Talk about pure love and dedication to him and the Lord's relationship.

My prayer is that in times of desperation and trials, the only words that would come out of my mouth and heart would be... "Blessed be the name of the LORD."

"Bless the Lord, O my soul; And all that is within me, bless His holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, And forget not all His benefits: Who forgives all your iniquities, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from destruction, who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies, who satisfies your mouth with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. . . .Bless the LORD, O my soul!" ~ Psalm 103:1-5, 22

for such a time as this.

The Summer has only started and I can already tell the Lord is going to do a mighty work in me to grow me and challenge me spiritually. I'm so thankful for all He has done so far in my life. As I looked back on the year the Lord showed me a few things I was late in realizing. I was blessed beyond measure -- don't get me wrong. He opened doors for ministry, brought me wonderful fellowship, and used me in ways I never thought could happen! Yet, through the blessings and the love that grew for the Lord, it was also difficult, often times treacherous, and sometimes a nightmare. Through certain circumstances I was suffering, struggling and literally gasping for air. Through the crying out and trusting in the Lord, I found myself bitter, angry, and annoyed with school. There were several nights I would just tell people how much I hated it, didn't enjoy it, and regretted choosing it, even though I KNEW God had a specific plan for me! Then that's when He revealed the problem.

I was never content. At all. The entire year.

One scripture verse I had on my wall was from Philippians stating that in ALL things we should be content! With food and clothing be content. Yet I had just rinsed that clear from my mind once I read it. Why? Because I spent my year grumbling, complaining and dissatisfied. I'm pretty sure the Lord looked down upon me and wasn't pleased. I realized that He didn't punish me for being dissatisfied, but through the heartaches and tribulations He was trying to tell me that I needed to be CONTENT in all things.

The Lord has shown me this past year new desires, new goals, and He has given me a new heart towards things I never knew I had a heart for, specifically ministry. It's my passion, it's my desire, it's what I want to labor for... for Jesus. I want every single part of me to give to the Lord what He deserves, DAILY! So in my mind I thought "What's the point in school? I want ministry.", yet He had me in school. In Esther it says that "..you were brought here for such a time as this."

So, this is MY time. School. The Lord has His reasons and His purposes, and His ways are above mine. I've come to realize that my problem all along was my dissatisfaction and discontentment with where He had/has me.

My prayer is that He would continue to ignite a flame inside my heart for my career and for my education, that He would make me 150% content in ALL THINGS...school, ministry, and others.

Once I fully realized what the problem was and prayed..it was as if He had poured upon me an overflow of peace, blessings, and excitement for this new up & coming year. Is our God good or what?

It's easy to take for granted all we have, and it's even easier to grumble, mumble and complain about something...anything...everything in our lives!! Where you are, is where the Lord has you, for such a time as this! To be dissatisfied and discontent is almost offensive to the Lord, for He has had these plans for you all along! Trust in Him, and pray that you would be content and satisfied in ALL and EVERY situation, circumstance and season you're in.

This is my prayer as well.

"Now godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content." - 1 Timothy 6:6-8

"Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am to be content. I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need." - Philippians 4:11-12