there's a purpose for every season under heaven.

God has revealed so much to me this past weekend. Incredible. Everyone says when one thing doesn't work out, there's a specific reason for it... my is that true. God has HIS plans and they won't fail. We think we know what we want but we disregard what God is trying to do in our lives...we like to lead, don't we? Sometimes it's hard to just sit back and trust that God has it all under control.

Years ago I would have never thought to be in ministry or to be in worship. I probably would have laughed at the idea, actually. My heart was elsewhere. Relationships, friends, vanity. My heart wasn't towards God's... and my desire wasn't for His work. I was too wrapped up in the relationships I was in at those times, always filling the void with guys instead of the love of Christ. Coming out of those years of not being satisfied I was at my wits end. I had continuously fallen into sin, and then getting back up only to discover I was going to fall again. This was a cycle in my life and I came to the end... depression, heart brokenness, anger, hurt and I never thought God could restore. But He did. He is SO faithful. Up until a year and a half ago, I had continuously filled my heart with things of this world, not caring what God had planned for me. College changed me. God began to show Himself strong to me... and I began falling more in love with Him. My heart and passion grew for people, Christ, worship, but most of all...ministry. He had called me to a higher calling than what I had for myself. He called me to worship and to bring people to Him. He put a passion and desire in my heart for women and girls. It's been a blessing to see Him blossom these desires and to grow me in my faith!

So I sit back and think... no WONDER those past relationships didn't work out. God had a different purpose than what I had for myself back then. Being in those relationships... I would have never thought of doing worship or being in a ministry God had called me to. But now.... I wouldn't dream of doing anything else. He just recently revealed it to me.... "The reason I didn't allow those relationships to work out was because you would have never desired what I have for you.... you would be held back... unwilling and unable to fulfill the calling I have for your life." Man... is He good or what?!

I would never want to be held back from what the Lord is calling me to... especially if that means giving up ALL I have for His purpose. I would drop anything and everything in an instant, just to make sure I am abiding in His love, and His purpose for me :) God is such a beautiful God. The only One who is truth :) I am so entirely in love with Him, and loving walking side by side Him every single minute of every day!!!

"To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven..." Ecclesiastes 3:1